Legitimate “Must See TV”

A month ago, I wrote about Lemonade Stories, a new documentary airing at 9pm tonight on CNNfn. Thanks to a generous gift from Ms. Mazzio, I watched the film last night. My original anticipation was rewarded.

The film is broken into segments with each entrepreneur and his or her mother spotlighted. I expected to sit through the early segments, hoping the film would get to Richard Branson quicker. During the opening segment with Arthur Blank, the co-founder of The Home Depot, I forgot that Richard Branson was in the film.

The concept is simple, straightforward, and worthwhile. Ultimately, the lesson each of these entrepreneurs has learned from mom is the inner spark we should all yearn to grasp: the unyielding longing to be themselves and the willingness to accept nothing else. But here’s the shocking revelation that I think defines why they’re successful. They’re willing to fight through the times when they don’t know who they are. And who is there to support them? You guessed it… mom.

This is particularly true of the stories of Richard Branson, founder of Virgin Atlantic and Tom Scott, co-founder of Nantucket Nectars. I’m not going to tell those stories here because you should watch the film. But there is an important lesson for every would-be and budding entrepreneur, offered by Mr. Scott. From the film, here is the lesson in his words:

“We do our case study at Harvard Business School and by the end they’ll say, ‘Well, these guys are really smart because they didn’t focus on supermarkets, they flew under the radar of Coke and Pepsi’. But it’s all B.S. cause I was there and I know what happened. Everything that they said that we did intelligently, we tried the other way and failed.”

My guess is that there are very few entrepreneurs who willingly strike out to break every rule. Entrepreneurs don’t try new businesses if they don’t intend to break some rules. That’s the nature of entrepreneurship. But it’s the rare lunatic who sets out to make the task as hard as possible.

Success seems logical in hindsight, but in the moment, the decisions aren’t easy. Mr. Scott and Mr. First knew that distribution would be the key to their business. The obvious answer is to sell to supermarkets and let them worry about distribution to the final location. Safeway, Piggly Wiggly, and Kroger are the experts, so that’s the way to go. But Nantucket Nectars isn’t Coke and Pepsi. This next quote from Paul Hawken’s book Growing a Business describes what I suspect Nantucket Nectars discovered when they couldn’t get into supermarkets:

The unpredicted is the gap between perception and reality. The unpredicted is your best toehold on reality because it is from these events that don’t “go right” that you can discover what is really happening with your business.

Coke and Pepsi are commodity beverages. Nantucket Nectars’ products aren’t commodity beverages now. They would only discover this through actions and mistakes. And the company is wildy successful because of their persistence in the face of failure. As the film shows, every featured entrepreneur’s persistence comes from mom.

As a teenager, my first business venture was delivering newspapers. I shared a route with my brother for the now-defunct evening paper in Richmond, Va. We continued this sharing until a second route opened in our neighborhood. I took this route, while my brother maintened the original. We shared expenses and profits, treating the two routes as a single entity to achieve economies of scale. We couldn’t have defined economies of scale if we’d heard the term, but we’d focused on our experience to understand the concept.

After we worked out delivery efficiency on the combined routes, we absorbed a third route. After a few months, we “divested” ourselves of the third route. We had customers who refused to pay, in addition to juvenile harassment from some of the neighborhood kids. (I’m a redhead… harassment is a fact of life.) Our initial analysis had told us that we’d build our empire further, but we were wrong.

Who was behind us, supporting this venture? Mom. (You thought I’d lost my focus, didn’t you?) On a day-to-day basis, my brother and I had it under control. We never had to borrow money to keep going, since a newspaper route isn’t capital intensive, but at 13, we couldn’t do everything.

When it rained, newspapers had to be bagged. This doesn’t seem too tedious since we got out of school at 3pm, but in the rain, our supply of newspapers usually arrived late. The newspapers had to be delivered by a set time, which I don’t remember. If they weren’t delivered on time, our customers could call the newspaper to complain. Each complaint cost us 25 cents. We only made pennies per day for each newspaper, so we couldn’t afford complaints. A few would destroy our profits for the month and that would mean fewer Garbage Pail Kids. (We were 13. Reinvesting was a foreign concept.) Guess who was there to help bag the papers? If the delivery was especially late, guess who was there to drive us on our routes? I even remember a few instances of riding in the back of her station wagon, tossing papers onto porches in the snow.

My mom never asked for anything in return. She never complained that she’d already worked a full day. She let us know we could get the job done, but on the occasions when we needed help, she’d be there. I can never repay that. My only response is gratitude.

At a time when there is significant discussion about family values, I can think of no better way to celebrate a mother’s impact than Lemonade Stories. The stories in the film are riveting and diverse, but the common theme is the same. Family values aren’t defined by Disney movies, Chutes and Ladders, and freshly-baked cookies. Family values can come in the form of a swearing mother who teaches her children to believe in themselves and to strive for self-defined success. That’s a lesson I can live with.

With the Covenant, who needs SD-6?

I dreamed last night that I saw David Anders at a rest area in Delaware.

Anyone who reads RollingDoughnut.com knows that I would love this if it actually happened. Why? Because David Anders portrays Sark on THE GREATEST TELEVISION SHOW EVER. Besides being completely random, this would be a spectacular opportunity to let him know how much Sark rules. That would be awesome!

But the dream became a nightmare when I realized that I drove off without speaking to him. Thankfully, I would never let that happen in real life. If only this would happen…

Mary Jane Watson will coach third base

After an unexpected break in the action, I now return you to my regularly scheduled outrage. Thank you for being patient.

———————————–

This news article from ESPN.com disturbs me. I’ve written about my love of baseball. Enough so that I suspect everyone can decipher how I’m going to feel about this prospect: (I’m a level-headed person, so I’m not reacting just to react. Seriously. Stop laughing.)

As part of a marketing alliance between Major League Baseball Properties, Columbia Pictures and Marvel Studios, webbed logos of the upcoming film “Spider-Man 2” will appear on bases and on-deck circles in 15 stadiums of teams playing host to interleague games June 11-13.

I enjoyed Spider-Man. I’ve seen previews of Spider-Man 2 and I’m sure I’m going to enjoy it. However, I’ve also been to baseball games and I know I enjoy that without advertisements on the bases.

There are ads all around stadiums. Stadium names are ads. Every empty space in the stadium has a logo slapped on it. There are even ads on the outfield walls. It’s no secret that sports fans are saturated with information overload to the point of ignoring the advertising. That doesn’t mean Major League Baseball should inundate us with more logos so that we “participate” as consumers.

The announcement Wednesday comes a day after presidential candidate Ralph Nader called the placement of Ricoh logos on the uniform and helmets of players during the season-opening series between the Yankees and Devil Rays in Tokyo “a greedy new low.”

I thought the same thing when I watched the season-opening series from Tokyo. I didn’t wake up at 5am to see logos on the players’ uniforms. I don’t want to see logos when I watch Jim Thome touch second base on a home run trot. Major League Baseabll isn’t Nascar. There has to be some sanctity to the history of the game. But all is not lost… Bob DuPuy, Major League Baseball’s president and chief operating officer, attempted to ease my fears.

“This is not a step toward wallpapering the ballpark.”

I don’t believe that. This is just the next step and any reasonable person has to assume that.

Never fret, though, because Mr. DuPuy has the perfect response to the purists:

“This does nothing to impact the play of the game,” DuPuy said. “The base doesn’t know that it has a corporate name on it, nor does the foot that hits the base.”

But the dollar wins every vote between purity and prosperity. It’s easiest to think short-term, with no thought given to respecting the game, respecting the players, and respecting the fans. This makes sense, thanks to the $100,000+ that teams like the Yankees and Red Sox will receive. They buy Alex Rodriquez, so I have to see Spider-Man 2 while eating my $4.50 fries and $3.50 bottle of water.

Finally, consider this logical quote from Geoffrey Ammer, president of worldwide marketing for the Columbia TriStar Motion Picture Group:

“This is the perfect alliance between two quintessential national pastimes — baseball and movie-going.”

I know whenever I think of the Phillies, my next thought is “Holy crap! I can’t wait to go to the movies!” If the “perfect alliance” really wants to do something interesting, put video screens in the back of seats and show movies during the game. Wait, nix that idea. With seatback video screens, we’ll just get 3 hours of commercials. Instead, I think I’ll just watch the game.

Looking out for the customer

Here at RollingDoughnut.com, I take great pride in being open 24 hours-a-day. It’s a great service I provide, because I’m nice that way. But it’s made possible by the Internet. The Internet rules.

Despite my generosity, I don’t follow the 24 hours-a-day policy. As much as I’d like to bill clients for 24 hours each day, they wouldn’t like it. Besides… it would be highly unprofessional to sleep at my desk. So, out of my sense of decency, I work 8 hours per day, Monday thru Friday, totaling the standard 40 hours per week.

Since it’s not a brilliant selling point, I leave my work hours out of my marketing literature. I don’t even post my hours anywhere. I have no storefront, no office building, no anything. I could post a sign in the grass, I guess, but that would be littering.

What’s the point of this? It’s ok, I know you’re asking yourself that very question right now. Allow me to continue.

As a busy person, like most people, I like the arrival of weekends, since I can relax a little. No early bedtime. No work preparation. No worries. It’s great to have a change of pace. The best part is, since it’s not a “school night”, some businesses keep different hours on Friday and Saturday than the rest of the week. Specifically, restaurants keep different hours. For the working man.

This past weekend, wanting to revel in sleeping late on Saturday, Danielle and I got a late dinner at Chicken Out. I was so overjoyed at their hours of operation, I took a picture of the door:

Brilliant! I can’t believe I didn’t think of it! On Friday and Saturday, let’s get a little crazy and close at 9 PM instead of 9:00 PM. As a service to all the night owls! Wowwee!

New policy in effect for my business, effective this week: Monday – Thursday, I go home at 5:30 PM, but on Fridays, I’m not outta here until Threeve O’Clock. You’re welcome.

The Fonz watches American Idol

I watched the last night’s American Idol results show. This season has been awful, with none of the captivating competition of the second season. The only battles this year have been how mean Randy can be and which contestant will suck the least each week. The only true description for this season is simple to explain: it’s boring.

What I find most interesting is that so many of the contestants are young and people are shocked that the competition is so bad. Just because someone is 16-years-old does not guarantee that the person can’t stun everyone, but emotional depth comes with experience. I’m generalizing without meaning to disparage, but the proof is obvious in this season’s performances. American Idol has spiraled to the level of satisfaction I would derive from watching a beauty pageant filled with 7-year-olds competing in a swimsuit competition.

Yet, I’m a fan of John Stevens, JSIV to the cool kids. While I liked Amy Adams, of the 12 contestants, JSIV is the most interesting. He’s young, so his talent is raw. He doesn’t appear comfortable showing his personality. He’s a block of wood during the dance numbers. But his voice is unique among the current competition and the notion of pop music that it portrays. There is a hidden variety and JSIV fills that. He’s interesting.

Unfortunately, the judges didn’t explain it that way. Simon did say as much early in the competition, but he offered criticism for most of the 7 weeks that JSIV performed. Paula was typically wishy-washy on voicing her opinion, but at least she wasn’t cruel. Randy doesn’t warrant an explanation, since he seemed to enjoy being mean. However, to his credit, Simon was right; JSIV took the criticism like a man. While Jennifer Hudson and Fantasia Barrino spewed attitude every time someone disagreed with them, JSIV accepted the verdicts with class and dignity. No one could expect more.

With that in mind, I’m dismayed by all the hatred being directed at JSIV. I don’t understand the unceasing need to attack his talent and to openly mock him. Ok, I do understand it, but I don’t agree with it. As a redhead who sings with a different style, it’s not surprising that he’s mocked. It’s the hatred that dismays me.

With the harsh criticism this season, I was amused last night. JSIV was voted off, so I’d hoped the reaction would be a sense of relief from everyone. The only relief was on JSIV’s face. Everyone else was busy wailing like little babies who’ve just been poked in the eye. I could only laugh at the hypocritical nonsense. Perhaps the lemmings will enjoy what they’ve molded for themselves. For me, I had the striking joy of watching American Idol Jump the Shark.

In late May, someone please give me a heads-up on who wins, since I won’t be watching anymore this season. I might even care when someone tells me.

A sliver of my genius

I didn’t feel like writing about Blender’s 50 Worst Songs Ever when it first came out. Even though it is the “definitive” list, I didn’t care. It’s self-serving publicity for magazine editors earned by taking broad shots at obvious targets done only to allow them to brag about how much cooler they are than the rest of us simpletons. I have no use for that and don’t generally wish to give any credence to that ploy. Yet, with the arrival of this article from USAToday.com about the shelf-life of American Idol contestants, I must write about it to make that connection with evidence I found in the articles. Consider this:

The Idol stage, however, has a trapdoor. [Clay] Aiken, in the lead with 2.5 million albums sold, “probably won’t have a lasting and meaningful career,” [Blender editor Craig] Marks says. “Kelly has juice left, but none of them will be around much longer, and they don’t necessarily deserve to be.”

Even a brief observation of Blender magazine shows that they wouldn’t be receptive to the American Idol “formula”. What exactly is the point in having Mr. Marks comment on the projected length of Clay Aiken’s career? I can only assume that it’s to show me what the “cool kids” know. I apologize for missing that memo in “How to be kewl like everybody else 101”, but I think this is poor journalism. It’s equivalent to newspapers and magazines that have non-country music fans review country music.

A source should have an affinity for the topic, or at least an objective viewpoint. This way, the music can be judged within the context of its niche. I’m not promoting formulaic music, but there is no “right” or “wrong” genre. Like what you like and enjoy it.

However, when looking at talent, can we blame the talent scouts instead of the fans? Continuing on in the article, there is this nugget:

Kim Buie, a talent scout for the Lost Highway label, agrees that Idol’s fruits are perishable.

“There’s no greater platform in this country than TV,” she says. “Viewers get involved in these kids’ lives and see their strengths and weaknesses week to week. The exposure absolutely helps in the launch of a record.

“Is the success long-term? Ask me again in five years. My guess is probably not. These singers deal in pop music of the moment. They’re told what to record and with whom. Long-term success is more complex. You grow into yourself; you have a point of view. Singing well isn’t enough.”

Coming from a talent scout at Lost Highway, that’s an interesting quote. Lost Highway is the “rebel” label that supports offbeat, less commercial music. They had Kim Richey on the label, but dropped her. She’s an amazing singer/songwriter who records great albums, so I can only assume it’s because her records weren’t selling well enough. Which leads to the conclusion that music is a business. Stunning.

Yet, that doesn’t stop the incessant ranking of what’s cool and hip. Continuing on with the American Idol theme, consider this assessment of three former contestants.

Clay Aiken

Sales: A. Airplay: B-. Artistic merit: C+. Celebrity Value: B. Overall: B

R.J. Helton

Sales: C. Airplay: C-. Artistic merit: B-. Celebrity value: C-. Overall: C+

Josh Gracin

Sales: N/A. Airplay: B-. Artistic merit: C+. Celebrity value: C+, Overall: C+

This is silly. Talent-wise, it’s impossible for me to comprehend that someone believes R.J. Helton has more “artistic merit” than Clay Aiken. Forget whether or not you prefer their music; for this discussion, it’s irrelevant. Clay Aiken has more raw talent and potential for the future than R.J. Helton could hope to dream about. Clay Aiken has a future to shape with his voice. If he needs to improve his song selection and reduce his cheese factor, that’s what his second album is for. And his third.

The word we’re looking for is “career”. As Ms. Buie said: “Long-term success is more complex.” It comes from musicians willing to change and grow. Who knows if Clay Aiken will… But he shouldn’t be counted out because he became famous on American Idol.

Consider Hanson‘s career. They were labeled a “boy band” because they were kids, they released a pop record (Middle of Nowhere), and that was the label in 1997. Slap the “boy band” label on them and there’s no thinking needed. When they have success, chalk it up to crazy little 13-year-old girls and smirk when they end up in drug rehab. It’s too bad they didn’t follow the script.

While Middle of Nowhere is a brilliant pop record, their second album, This Time Around is a stunning, raw rock record. They matured and it showed in their music. Yet, the album didn’t sell. Maybe it was the “boy band” label, maybe not. Whatever the reason, I’m sure there was some pre-conceived notion about them that hurt sales. But that doesn’t change the album.

Yesterday, they released their latest album, called Underneath. This is an amazing album. It’s a tremendous step forward in craft, both musically and lyrically. I’m glad I didn’t dismiss them because they’re not kewwwwwl. Growth is fun to watch.

Since that’s not cool to discuss in hip circles and making fun of people is acceptable, we have the list of “50 Worst Songs Ever”. Here’s the list of Blender’s “Bottom of the Barrel”:

1. “We Built This City” – Starship (1985)
2. “Achy Breaky Heart” – Billy Ray Cyrus (1992)
3. “Everybody Have Fun Tonight” – Wang Chung (1986)
4. “Rollin'” – Limpbizkit (2000)
5. “Ice Ice Baby” – Vanilla Ice (1990)
6. “The Heart of Rock & Roll” – Huey Lewis & The News (1984)
7. “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” – Bobby McFerrin (1988)
8. “Party All the Time” – Eddie Murphy (1985)
9. “American Life” – Madonna (2003)
10. “Ebony and Ivory” – Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder (1982
)

I don’t like all of those songs, but the worst songs ever? Doubtful. Just like you, I now need to load up “Party All the Time” and blare it at full volume. These songs are not going to save the world, but that doesn’t mean they’re not valid. Music can be good without being serious. In this context, my definition of “good” is “fun”. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying fun music.

There is a caveat for a song to make the list, as Blender editor Craig Marks explains:

Each dud had to be a hit to make the hit list. Though Right Said Fred’s I’m Too Sexy got in, such novelties as Macarena and Who Let the Dogs Out, which by design are cheesy, were nixed. The jury also whittled down the bulk of “rotten, excruciatingly bad low-hanging fruit from the ’70s,” Marks says.

However, so that there’s no confusion over what we’re supposed to think, there’s this:

Starship’s 1985 anthem, the runaway No. 1 stinker, “seems to inspire the most virulent feelings of outrage,” editor Craig Marks says. “It purports to be anti-commercial but reeks of ’80s corporate-rock commercialism. It’s a real reflection of what practically killed rock music in the ’80s.”

The list may contain a diversity of songs, but most of the “worst” songs are from the 80’s and very early 90’s. Blender believes it knows exactly how to define good rock music. I suspect they whittle this down to a simple maxim: rock music paused with the end of Led Zeppelin and un-paused with the arrival of Nirvana. Ridiculous.

Finally, to make sure that everyone understands the truth, there’s this wonderful nugget of open-minded insight:

To accommodate coming horrors, the list can’t be considered definitive. Noting that Clay Aiken’s Invisible landed at No. 11, Marks predicts that “as soon as the American Idol season is finished, there will be a new entry.”

Lists like this are stupid. But we can all agree that “Achy Breaky Heart” is the worst song ever.

Not my America

According to this article, the “New Mexico Republican Central Committee has voted to censure the Sandoval County clerk, who issued marriage licenses to same-sex couples.” Here are a few details of the censure:

Dunlap issued 66 same-sex marriage licenses on February 20th before the sheriff, acting on instructions from the state attorney general stepped in and shut down her office.

At the time, Dunlap said she feared a lawsuit if she did not grant the licenses to gay couples. The county attorney in a legal opinion to Dunlap after San Francisco began allowing gays to marry said that denying marriage licenses to same-sex couples in New Mexico was against the state constitution.

A judge issued a temporary restraining order to prevent Dunlap from issuing any more same-sex licenses and the case is currently before the courts.

Not everyone agreed with the censure. I’m not willing to shout Barry Bitzer’s name from the roof of my building, announcing him to be the savior of the Republican Party, but he deserves some credit for common sense. This is his reasoning for being the lone dissenter against the censure:

“I’m afraid this will be played as a gay issue and not a good government issue,” he told the committee.

I’m not trying to play party politics for the ultimate point I’m going to make here. I’m not a fan of the rhetoric of the Democratic Party. I only “support” them because I disagree with them less. That’s an unfortunate reflection on the state of American politics. But I must point this out… from the party of “inclusion”, there’s this gem:

“We need to make clear we don’t support her actions, we don’t support her now and we will never support her in the future,” said former Rio Rancho City Councilor Lonnie Clayton. “The perception is that our silence is consent.”

No need to remain open-minded. What good would that do?

As everyone knows, I’ve written extensively on the same-sex marriage debate. Obviously, I want to persuade people to agree with me. I feel I’ve represented my side well. If you don’t agree with me, that’s fine. If I’ve made you think about the debate in something other than just a knee-jerk “I don’t support it,” that’s great. Differing opinions makes this world an interesting place.

With that in mind, I hope that I don’t need to persuade anyone to the correct opinion about this rationale for the censure:

“Other than assassination, all we can do is censure her,” said committee chairman Richard Gibbs.

Assassination? Assassination? Assassination! I’m at a loss, but that quote speaks for itself. Which country is this?

Two-for-one entry

I never commented on The Apprentice while it aired, but I was addicted. I’m “proud” of myself for picking Bill halfway through the series. I’m “proud” of myself for picking why Mr. Trump chose Bill over Kwame. (It’s not a real source of pride on either point. It’s a tv show, so it doesn’t really matter. Unless it’s Alias. Then it matters more than anything else.)

At the time that Kwame was fired, I didn’t think much more about his future. But it’s no surprise that he’s receiving offers for employment. He’s a qualified businessman (from what I can tell from an edited, weekly television show) with a good education and impressive professional experience. So there’s little mystery that he would get offers. As this article states:

The real game has just begun for “The Apprentice” runner-up Kwame Jackson. Any regret over losing a job with Donald Trump to competitor Bill Rancic was quickly salved by a rush of offers and by Jackson’s own ambitions to make the most of his reality TV fame.

“This was basically a chance to have NBC pay for a 15-episode Kwame commercial in a business environment,” Jackson said of “The Apprentice.”

Ignoring the third person reference to himself, that’s exactly what it was, with the added benefit that NBC knew to edit it well. NBC is not going to humiliate Donald Trump by portraying Kwame Jackson as an incompetent. So it was an ideal situation for him. And losing may not be worse than winning:

Being No. 2 is turning out to be as much a problem for Jackson as it was for “American Idol” runner-up Clay Aiken, who has outsold winner Ruben Studdard.

“My theme is, ‘Don’t cry for me, Argentina,” said Jackson, 30, a Wall Street investment manager before “The Apprentice.”

All the exposure with the bonus of leaving his options open? Sounds like a deal to me.

Now that I’ve made my point, I’d like to roll in the mud for a moment. I’m basing my opinion on the same editing tactics that NBC used to make Kwame Jackson look good, but I despised Omarosa’s “antics”. She appeared fake and a miserable bore. I suspect it would’ve been a challenge to edit her into such a ridiculous character if she didn’t provide enough evidence.

For that reason, Kwame surprised me when he picked her for his team. I screamed at the tv when he didn’t fire her from his team during his final assignment (managing the Jessica Simpson concert).

Even the antics of Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth, whose scheming may have cost Jackson the top prize – a $250,000, yearlong job with Trump – is something he shrugs off.

During Jackson’s final “Apprentice” test, staging a concert with Jessica Simpson (news), Manigault-Stallworth flubbed transportation for the pop singer and appeared to fib about it.

Does Jackson think she lied to him?

“There’s no ‘think’ about it. It’s 100 percent on the tape. There’s no need to think about it. It’s like watching Rodney King get beat: How did the bruise happen?” he said.

I wish I’d thought of that line.

Get up and go

Ummmmm… Guess what happened last night? I know this will shock everyone, but I got trapped in the bathroom again.

Really, this is getting ridiculous. Because it’s been a little while, I thought I was past the point of relapse. As you may remember from the second time this happened, it was only three days after the first occurrence. This time, I managed to evade capture for 8 days since incident number three.

I’m amazed that this continues to happen. Questions mount without explanation… Why am I shutting the door when I have the master bedroom in my house? How do I become so disoriented in such a short span of time? What is behind this debacle?

After being snared for the third time, I wake up and mentally talk to myself when I get up in the night. Where am I? What time is it? Questions like that. It’s helped, until last night.

My only memory is standing in my bathroom during the night, with no clue where I was. Granted this is an improvement because I was on my feet. Unlike the past, my first was “Unbelievable. I’m trapped. Again!”. At least some part of me has a clue that I need to defend myself from my incoherent sleepy adventures.

When I realized that I was trapped again, I determined to figure out where I was. My bathroom is tiny, so even though I shouldn’t get trapped, I should at least be able to decipher my location within the confined space with little trouble. Last night, I hit a bonus on my first attempt.

There are two towel racks in my bathroom, but one set of screws holding one of the towel racks came loose. The hole was worn out to a size larger than the screw, so the hook fell off, with the bar sliding after it. That left this in my wall:

I had no idea how I was going to fix this.

My plan is to fix it, but I’ve been very slow for two reasons. First, the Phillies are on TV this week. Second, I’ve never fixed a wall before. From this mini-home-improvement, I’ve learned the joy of spackle. So this is what that side of the towel rack looks like now:

I've spackled this thing three times.  Because it's fun.

But I digress. That leaves one part of the towel rack still attached to the wall. When I was standing in the bathroom and knew that I was trapped again, I determined to figure out where I was. With a little luck, I leaned back and the towel hook poked my in the spine.

Eureka! The door was on my left. I reached out my hand and found the knob immediately. Opening the door, I escaped and went back to bed. My only thought was that I had a savior, which allowed me to write this today. Here it is:

Maybe I shouldn't finish fixing the towel rack...

My towel rack may have saved my life. Procrastination rocks!

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

In my new role as business owner, I’m managing my actions differently. For example, I have to account for my own invoicing and payroll taxes. Money coming in, money going out. It’s wonderful. However, I didn’t realize the extent to which I’d be adapting to new situations.

As a part of my contract, my client must provide a desk, telephone, and computer. Since I’ve been at this client before, I had a set expectation of what my desk situation would be. Possibly bunched up with others, maybe even sharing a cubicle with someone. A little certainty in running a business is nice. Hahahahahahahahaha.

Instead, I was put in a different building, a long walk from my co-workers. Here’s the view from my desk, in order – on my left, in front, on my right, and behind:

I like columns.

It's very airy.

There are also a few tiny “houses” around, such as this:

This is a conference room.

As you may have guessed, I’m in an atrium. This is not an accident of space. I’m on the second floor, with no view into the first floor. This wonderful design pleased me greatly, until I sneezed the first time. The sound echoed around the atrium so that everyone on the second floor knew I’d sneezed. When I dropped my pen on the desk, same thing. So a little adjustment was necessary.

My normal speaking voice “carries well”. Fine, I’ll admit it… on the occasions when I talk, I’m loud. But I didn’t know realizes that I’d have to adjust to avoid a nice case of skin cancer. Take a look at my cubicle at lunch time:

That's the floor, with my desk and the trash can shadowed by the sun.

Imagine what that does to my forehead. And what is the source of this? Take a look:

The black hole sucks out my productivity from 11:30 until 2:45.

I should be an architect. Without a degree in architecture, I could’ve designed this building with more intelligence. It’s not easy being superior.