Do the chickens have large talons?

Here’s an interesting story about a Napoleon Dynamite pen that’s causing some anger stupidity. It makes me wish I could go back in time. I’d take state. Consider:

Melissa Hart is angry about new pens that her children and others may be offended by when they return to the classroom next week.

The Wethersfield mother of three, who has a 3-year-old with Down syndrome, recently learned about pens from the popular film “Napoleon Dynamite,” which has a recording that says, “You guys are retarded.”

I’m certainly guilty of thinking Napoleon Dynamite is hilarious. I even laughed at the “you guys are retarded” line. Might as well do somethin’ while I’m doing nothin’. No doubt that adds to the evidence that I’m a bad person, as I’ve contended for years. I even accept that I’m probably going to Hell, most notably thanks to my hatred for all things Wal-Mart and my consecutive votes against George W. Bush. But this is ridiculous. It’s a toy that can shade upper lips. That doesn’t justify one sensitive parent and equally stupid school officials who believe that the purpose of education is to “convey the message that it is not OK to marginalize students with intellectual disabilities.” Perhaps I find the wrong sort of comedy funny, and perhaps I’m missing some distinction that tells me using the word “retarded” is never funny. Perhaps I’m just a dunce. I contend that I’m not, though. Consider this language from the online petition started by Melissa Hart in response to this toy.

Second, reconsider your standards in respect to human rights.

I don’t understand a word you just said. Human rights? There’s no right to not be offended or mocked. And why is this nonsense being passed along to Connecticut’s Attorney General? Is he Pedro’s cousin with all the sweet hook-ups, who you think can make this illegal? Gosh! Stop ruining everybody’s lives and eating all our steak. Go tame a wild honeymoon stallion, instead.

Hat tip: Radley Balko