I should stage my fake abduction

I try not to get too wrapped up in celebrity worship, but sometimes I can get sucked in against my will. Earlier this week… yes, I know I’ve been away for a little while. I’m back now and will catch everyone up on the monumental last few weeks… So, I was watching VH1 earlier this week, specifically Best Week Ever. I’d followed the show a little bit since Wil Wheaton mentioned his involvement several months ago. I’ve enjoyed being “in the know” about his involvement, since I read his blog regularly. So I was watching the other night, with the hope that he’d be involved in the episode. That didn’t prepare me for what I saw as I watched.

The episode progressed nicely, with some mildly funny snark. That’s a great introduction a show, so I kept watching. Then the duo from ModernHumorist.com came on to talk about a news story, which thoroughly escapes me now. The reason it escapes me is simple: I was screaming “Holy shit!” at my television. The duo that founded ModernHumorist.com are Michael Colton and John Aboud. Admittedly, I’ve never met Michael Colton, but I spent the seven years of middle and high school as friends with Aboud. He sat on my right (or did I sit on his left, now that he’s the celebrity?) every day during lunch. I hung out at his house with a bunch of friends the day I returned from Virginia Tech‘s freshman orientation. Blah, blah, blah.

I’ve had friends who have media exposure and success. My friend Kevin is a sports writer; he covers the Minnesota Vikings for the Star Tribune. Before that, he covered the Baltimore Orioles for The Washington Times. He’s covered the last few Super Bowls. Blah, blah, blah.

I’m accustomed to watching my friends have success. I’m happy for them, so I don’t want to seem jealous or resentful. But there’s a unique reaction to seeing someone I know on television. So I screamed “Holy shit!”.

The first thing I did was call my brother to tell him to turn on VH1. Then I called Danielle to lament that “my life was over”. She wisely assured me that my life was not over. Unfortunately, she was unavailable this afternoon when I reached page 73 of the new issue of Entertainment Weekly. Specifically, this text:

It’s a brilliantly simple concept featuring comics like Chuck Nice, Brian Huskey, Donnell Rawlings, the far-too-rarely-seen Rachael Harris, plus the cham-peen deadpan kings of Best Week, the duo John Aboud and Michael Colton of the webzine “Modern Humorist.”

accompanied by this picture:


After reading through this, I did some searching. I found this link to Best Week Ever panelists. I also found video that’s funny. My consolation prize in this is that I made Aboud laugh in high school. I remember one uncontrollable-laugh-inducing incident involving dry wit, Richard Simmons and Deal-A-Meal.

Maybe it’s time to dust off the novel…

One thought on “I should stage my fake abduction”

  1. OH Tony, I thought you were going to talk about that girl that “faked” her Abduction! Where have you been? My blood pressure was almost back to normal.

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